I don’t know if I mentioned before, my now not so little sister has Aspergers, my big brother has little traits of Autism, and his son ADHD and Autism.
Well at school, we have been having SEN reviews for Ruth as they put her forward for Speech Therapy. 4 months later we have appointments… woohoo. Then…. last review, after they were previously told about the genetic link……. they have asked if it is OK for her to be watched by the Autism team! The little red flags I’ve seen at home got me wondering personally, but now school are seeing things. Am I shocked? No. It was always a possibility to start with.
But…… after this morning and her mini Nursery Farewell Celebration, it has made me feel quite sad. No, not in the leaving nursery sense, but with how she couldn’t cope with everything this morning. Let me set the scene… Smallish room, all the parents in as well, noise etc. Did she stand and sing with the class? No. She mentally couldn’t take it all. We are talking tears and having to be physically attached to a teacher throughout the 20 minutes it took. Did she happily collect her leaving certificate? No, more tears, and an appearance from our dear friend Freddy fat lip. Oh and covering her face. Then when i was leaving more, more tears and need of teacher cuddles. Now on a normal day she copes fine in the class albeit her lack of getting involved with other kids and activities with them (she plays alongside only). So as you can guess, today really hit me where it hurts. All the signs we are discussing with the teachers, absolutely slammed us in the face like a sledgehammer. The poor girl wasn’t having any of it this morning, and it wasn’t just her being difficult because I know that side of her very well too!
You know when you feel helpless?? Well, that was me, unable to help her cope with a sensory overload. Too many people, too much noise, couldn’t cope. Doubtless to say, I came home a little upset and behind closed doors have had a weep.
Part of me is saying “My poor little girl what shall we do? “, the other half “We can do this. It is being looked at. We have seen it all before and are still here and sane to a point!”. I KNOW we can do this, sort coping mechanisms and plans to help her learn to live as stress free as possible whilst still dealing with life. Its just the initial, this is happening stage! Yes, I feel stupid for getting so emotional, its not like it is a major shock she has problems. I now need to find ways to keep her functioning, because when she hits adulthood, we know the world out there could either become a over stressful place for her or a copeable place for her….. and this all depends on how we guide her in her childhood to be able to cope with what life throws at her. I hate seeing her like she was this morning, and know there is no cure for Autism however mild and severe it may be. Hopefully we will get answer in the following year. Our city isn’t the fastest in getting everything sorted, so not expecting anything done quick!
On that note, I must cheer up and think holiday…… we go in 2 days, still not packed (but that is normal for me anyway!). Maybe a holiday and break will help us all refresh!
In the meantime, if any of you readers have a mini fountain of knowledge I can glean advice from, feel free to suggest ways of helping. I would greatly appreciate it.